June 20, 2008 - Fasten your seatbelts...it's a wild ride!

Well, here I am! I finally did it! I started our family blog...this after being on bedrest for 9 weeks and doing absolutely nothing productive. Although I don't know if you can call this productive, but I guess it beats watching re-runs of "A Baby Story" on TLC over and over again.

So since this is my first post, bear with me because I have a lot to say to get you caught up. You may already know our story, but here's the long and (not so) short of it, and the reason I have been on bedrest for 9 weeks...

Well, the short of it is...we are pregnant! And not just pregnant, but expecting identical twin girls! We are over the moon excited about it, after battling infertility and enduring 2 cycles of IVF in a matter of 4 months. Lucky for us (and our savings account) the 2nd time was a charm.

From the beginning, this pregnancy has been nerve-wracking (to say the least). From tests showing we weren't pregnant, to tests showing maybe we were, back to no we weren't (this went on for more than 2 weeks) we finally proved the doubtful doctors wrong with an ultrasound. On March 24th, at 6 weeks and 6 days pregnant, we were officially declared pregnant. Right there on the ultrasound monitor were 2 beautiful and strong little heartbeats! The most perfect little blobs I had ever seen. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry...so I did both.

We cruised along for a few weeks with minimal stress, having weekly ultrasounds with our infertility specialist and seeing our little blobs getting bigger and more recognizable as humans... until WHAMMO!, our first complication...April 19, 2008, at 10 weeks and 4 days pregnant. Off we rushed to the ER because of bleeding. Luckily the babies were fine, but I was put on bedrest diagnosed with a subchorionic hematoma (a fancy word for a blood clot). At that point all the experts were saying we had a 50% chance of miscarriage...but we knew from the beginning that our little girls were fighters.

So onward and upward for a few weeks...babies kept growing, I kept watching too much of "A Baby Story" (and playing too many video games). Around 13 weeks the doc called to tell me I had a bladder infection and I was anemic. No big deal...a few antibiotics and an iron supplement will clear that stuff right up. So our week 14 ultrasound came and the babies still were doing great. The blood clot was shrinking, but still there so I continued on bedrest. Our next appointment was scheduled for May 28 with the perinatologist. It was then that our world started to turn upside down.

It was at this appointment, our 16 week ultrasound, that we were told we had the beginning signs of Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. I had read a little about it, but didn't think it could happen to us. TTTS is a horrible disease of the placenta whereby the babies share uneven blood flows, and if left untreated, comes with a 95% fetal mortality rate. It basically kills otherwise perfectly healthy little babies in utero. I immediately went home and got on the internet, where I was able to learn more about this disease at tttsfoundation.org. A couple of days later I got in touch with a doctor in Milwaukee who invented a surgery that can, in many cases, cure the disease. But, we had to wait until the babies were sick enough to qualify for the surgery (otherwise the risks outweigh the benefits).

So we waited and waited and waited. Hours seemed like days. Days seemed like weeks. At our next appointment, 17 weeks, the condition was worsening. It was suggested that we consult with a surgeon about our options. And our peri happened to know of an excellent fetal surgeon at USC (I hope this doesn't mean I will actually have to be a fan of the Trojans now). I should point out that there are only about 15 doctors in the country that perform the procedure we may need.

I came home from the doctor that day...beside myself with worry and crying inconsolably. Brian rushed home from work to find me on the sofa, crying about the TTTS and doubled over with pain in my right side that seemed to be getting progressively worse. After about an hour, we took our second trip to the ER. The pain was horrible. I mean really bad. Crying hysterically, can't remember the ride to the hospital kind of pain. Just to add to the fun, it turns out I was passing a kidney stone. And by the way...it's not something I recommend. If you've ever had kidney stones, you know what I'm talking about.

At exactly 18 weeks pregnant, we went to our 2nd appointment with the USC doc. The condition had worsened and we now qualified for the surgery. The babies were still ok, except Baby A's bladder had collapsed and her amniotic fluid level was so low she was basically "shrink-wrapped" in her sac, unable to move...her little arm stuck above her head. The doctor's success rates gave us a 93% chance of bringing home 1 baby and a 73% chance of bringing home both. Although risky, it was a no-brainer. We scheduled the surgery for the next day...June 10th.

At 5:30am on June 10th, I was admitted to Hollywood Presbyterian Hospital. I was wheeled into the operating room at 7:30am. They gave me my happy juice (and happy I became)...then some heavy sedation and a local anesthetic, and the surgery got under way at about 8:15. Most of these surgeries take about 30-40 minutes. Mine took a little over 2 hours. If I remember correctly the clock said 10:32 when they were done. Apparently, and for various reasons, including bad amniotic fluid (which they had to drain and replace) and a velamentous cord placement on Baby B, my surgery was the "most complicated case I've ever seen" (so the miracle doctor says). Please don't get me wrong, I'm not bragging, but for those of you who know me, you know I tend to make everything more difficult than it needs to be...so really, this was not a surprise to us. We were told that the next 24 hours were critical. We would have an ultrasound the next morning to see if the babies survived the surgery. Tuesday night in the hospital was rough. I was having contractions so they put me on magnesium sulfate. That stuff didn't agree with me at all, but I made it through the night with Brian by my side every step of the way. At about 9:30 Wednesday morning I was taken for an ultrasound. We were told it would take a couple of weeks to see any improvement in Baby A's bladder and amniotic fluid levels. The miracle doctor began the scan. The silence in the room was deafening. With his first sigh of relief he said "one heartbeat"...and with a HUGE second sigh of relief he literally shouted "two heartbeats!" And to make the news even better, little Baby A's bladder was already visible and her fluid levels were already starting to improve. Our little girl was peeing again...making her parents proud. We were released from the hospital and went home so I could sleep off the horrible hangover I had from all of the meds.

Ok...I just realized how long I've been "talking". I'm almost done, I promise. And thanks for sticking with me...if you're still here.

So, we made our first post-surgery appointment with our perinatologist. Tuesday June 17th at 11:30. I also had a previously scheduled appointment with my OB at 9:30 that day. The level of stress and anxiety we had going into these appointments is pretty much indescribable. I mean, we made it past the first 24 hour hurdle, but the next 4 weeks are critical as well, as it takes about that long for the babies to recover from the surgery. We went to the OB, who used a doppler to hear the heartbeats. He had a bit of a hard time finding two, and left us with "I think there's 2 heartbeats." Not the most reassuring news, but we will have an ultrasound in 2 hours to confirm. The weather here was beautiful, and since I had been on house arrest for so long, in between appointments, we picked up a Happy Meal and parked at the beach and enjoyed our lunch and the ocean breeze before going to the peri.

Finally, 11:30 came and off we went to the peri. They told us it would be a long appointment so that they could do a growth and anatomy scan. Whatever...just show me 2 heartbeats! So the ultrasound began and there they were...our 2 beautiful babies with 2 strong heartbeats! Baby A's fluid increased enough that she can move, and I think she was even kicking her sister! The scan continued and we learned of 2 perfect brains, 2 perfect hearts, 4 kidneys, 2 bladders and what we think we have counted as 20 fingers and 20 toes! Nothing but good news. I cried. If I didn't know better I would say Brian was choking back a tear or two himself (although he'd probably kill me if he knew I told you that). The doctors hugged us and congratulated us. It was a beautiful day and the first appointment since the beginning that we actually got nothing but good news.

So here we are. It's June 20th. Brian is working today. It's about 85 degrees down here at the beach. I'm sitting in bed with "A Baby Story" on the TV (an episode I've actually never seen before). Mom is stopping by to feed me some lunch in a little bit. Our next appointment is scheduled for Monday June 23rd where we will hopefully learn that the babies are still doing great. I don't know how they couldn't be. They've proved to be such fighters. I'm still waiting to feel their little kicks. I think I probably have already, but I keep convincing myself that everything I feel is just gas. Yes, I embarrassingly admit that I have gas. All the time. Poor Brian.

Well, I guess that's all for today. Certainly I have "talked" long enough. I wonder if any of you who started to read are actually still here or not??? Oh, I forgot to mention...the surgery...it was filmed for a Discovery documentary and possibly a motion picture. We had to sign our lives away that we wouldn't ask for any money or anything, but maybe someday my little uterus and our unborn daughters will make it to the big screen. Who knew!!! Well, whatever they do with the footage...we felt if it could help just one person who has to deal with a heartbreaking diagnosis of TTTS, then surely we would consent.

Ok, I am almost done now. I promise. We know we have lots of people praying for us and our little girls and we know those prayers are what's keeping them fighting. So thank you for all the love and support. I will update our blog regularly and certainly on Monday after our appointment.

And one last thing I should mention. In future posts I will likely no longer refer to the girls as Baby A and Baby B. We have finally decided on names. They are officially Madison Marie and Abigail Renee.